Sexual Aversion (Disorder)
Despite sexual intercourse being a very natural process, some of us actually have a phobia of this! Attempting to engage in sexual intercourse, regardless of whether it is done with a stranger or a loved one, can be a highly distressing personal experience, which can, of course, be a very quick way of damaging or ending any relationship or contact. Sexual aversion can be one of the most difficult sexually related conditions to treat or manage, as it is usually the result of a trauma from earlier in life, therefore is most often a psychological matter. Seeing as life has us navigate our way through countless situations, the original cause can be forgotten or muted, making diagnosis difficult. Although symptoms such as stress, anxiety and depression can play a large role and can be difficult to diagnose, once diagnosed, finding the root cause of these symptoms can lead to greater understanding, and potentially, treatment of the sexual aversion. Additionally, it is important to note that sexual aversion may be a permanent condition that is always present, or it may be situational (only occurs with a specific person or partner), which can also lead to having sex with strangers if unable to have sex with a loved one.
While for some of us, sexual aversion can potentially be a convenient excuse over the course of a night out (am I right?), It can cripple the sexual and social lives of many. While both males and females over the course of their lifetimes experience increases and decreases in sexual activity and desire, if it is caused by a fear of sexual contact or rejection of the urge itself (or similar symptoms), then perhaps a more serious issue is present.
Rejection is a very real concern for those of us afflicted. Even a cheeky friend telling you to “just get over it”, can be a crippling sentence when unable to speak about the issue for fear of…. rejection.
With the rise/ acceptance/ acknowledgement of psychological and/or sexual therapy, an acceptance of one’s self and experiences can minimise and potentially cure the sexual aversion present within a person. As with most sexually related conditions, the main problem is recognising that there is a problem to be fixed and pushing past the ego to seek out help. Imagine being able to have sex without consequences (every adolescent’s wet dream in a sentence right there)! Thankfully, that situation can be a reality for those who experience sexual aversion. Through recognition, understanding and acceptance, the way can be paved for shame-free, guilt-free and fear-free sex!
I am a sexologist, accredited psychosexual therapist and a sex counsellor.
If you want to learn more, give me a visit (Gold Coast, Brisbane, Online)